Rants Of A Confused Adolescent
 



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Stupid Speke Hall Things

Herons Nest In Power Pylons (Day 3)

The power for this block just cut out for a whole second and jolted me as the internet reset itself through the router next door. I wasn't worried that I'd lost communication, no sir. Just that I've got photos for y'all. As requested, here's some Power Christ.

 

Mardi Gras Tail Feather Christ

 

 Purple Robed Power Ranger Super Lucha Christ

 

Jesus "The Messiah" Christ's Fight Publicity Poster

 

Someone disapproves... (Sounds like a surreal comic pairing)

 

 

Conclusive proof that it was the KKK who killed JHC.

 

Jesus Tag Teams in St. Andrew

 

Jesus' Allies: Batfink and... 

 

...Boromir.

 

Fashionable Marian Worship Hairstyles Available Here

 

Down at the Nature Reserves, the herons nest on the tip of every power pylon. 

 

This day was spent slipping and sliding slowly into the slums of southern Spain. Huelva, Isla Cristina, areas of Ayamonte even. It was odd looking into those one room houses when there are so many silent and dark villas up here on the hills at night. Bar that, though, it was the usual tourist trap of churches, cathedrals and municipal water works. Restaurant meals and herbal liquors. Painkillers (me and the mother mixed and matched) and roadside picnics. And driving, LOTS of driving. This is the corner of Andalucia that Columbus set sail from: so grim as to drive people TO the Americas.

Well...not that bad. We're missing the Procession right now, but that's not so bad. It's just that after the restaurants and the liquors, when I'm feeling full and the house is warm, I notice particularly how isolated these family holidays are. I used to take cousins to Spain with me back when we borrowed someone ELSE'S house for the summers (N.B. that teacher has since gone the way of most teachers and is now living there permanently) and now I notice the empty beds all round this house and wish I'd found someone to take. I may load up on mosquito spray tonight and stroll around in the dark until sleep drops on my like a heavy rain. Or a heron out a power pylon.

5.4.07 21:34


Dress-up Barbie Goes to Fashion Hell

Serving fake real biscuits.


In a footman's outfit.


In a Victorian Christmas setting in a Tudor Hall.


On a plastic platter.


In front of friends.


Nuff' said.

3.12.03 22:57


"Ask the lady..."

It's a toss-up between


i) The Obnoxious American family (with a hyperactive child) who pretended I didn't exist


"I wonder if there's a guide, or we just figure it out."


"I'm a guide." <points to GUIDE badge>


"Hey MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM. Look it's one of those piano-thing mover things."


"That's a barrell-organ. It was-"


<Family have left>


OR


ii) The Woman Who Came In With Her Kwestioning Kids, looked straight at me and said


"Why not ask that lady over there?"


"Excuse me ma'am, but I'M A MAN."


"Oh...well..."


"No no, it's quite an easy mistake to make..."


 


<ahem>


 


Quite.

23.11.03 22:48


Numerical Order: 17+2=20

This first entry actually features a member of the British Public (shock!) rather than the minority of Americans that visit and say the majority of stupid things.


"Here you can see William Norris and his children..."


"Ooooh, there's seventeen!"


"No, ma'am. The two in the front count as well."


"Oh so that makes...<pause>...Twenty. He had twenty children?! Gosh."


 


She was about thirty...

17.11.03 22:22





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